Learning to Let Go

Let me begin by apologizing for leaving my loyal readers hanging, so to speak. I know you must all be on tenterhooks wondering what's happened to me, right? In a word - Lots.

Rose Garden Rose

The SF Fragrance Salon was great, and it wasn't. If you've been following the chatter on Facebook, you already know the problems associated with TasteTV and their ambivalence toward the fragrance community. The signs they supplied were evidence enough of that. On the other hand, the perfumers were fabulous. What a great and wonderful group of people I am happy to say I am a part of. And what's come from the Salon and its dismissive attitude toward US has spurred a new kind of perfume show, run by a perfumer(s) specifically geared toward perfumers. FRAGments is up and running and the first ever show is June 22, 2013 in Los Angeles.

Rose Garden Rose

The trip to SF and Berkeley was about more than just the Salon. It was an experience I will never forget, mostly because I came without accoutrements, i.e. my shield of family. Whenever I go to any event out of town, and even a few things here in town, I tow along a kid, or my mom. A protective cloak of diversion to keep me from being me -- or, rather, to keep me from discovering me. Even the person I rode into SF with to attend the salon had at one point reminded me I didn't need to stick close by her side, that I could go off and do my own thing. It was as if I'd been waiting for permission. Do you think it odd that a woman of my age is still feeling these things out? The sad fact is, I've NEVER been alone. Not really. I helped raise my younger siblings, and then when I was ready to go out on my own finally, I had a child of my own, and thus began this process of hiding myself under the responsibility of motherhood, until now, when I feel the burden of helping to raise grandchildren becoming more than I can bear. I'm ready to strike out on my own. In fact, I was once again reminded of my dependency on my 'shield' last night when I asked my daughter if she wanted to ride to the store with me to grab a few things for dinner, and her reply was, "Why can't you go anywhere by yourself?" This time I realized that I wasn't asking her along for company or to block the world out, but because I was already in my pajamas and didn't want to go into the store myself, instead I wanted to send her in. But her saying that brought all that to the fore once again, so I pulled on some jeans and a t-shirt, grabbed my car keys and left to shop on my own. I can see now how just being lazy is perceived as me being self-protective, and even that is lazy. So my goal this year is to do everything, or almost everything, alone.

Rose Garden Roses Bouquet

Remember back at the beginning of March when I mentioned the impending closing of the office where I work? Well, it turns out it might not be closing, but downsizing, and I've been retained and somewhat promoted (not really, just placed closer to the front door), but only after three employees were laid off -- one who'd worked there 26 years, another 22 years, and yet another 15 years. It was a sad, sad day Monday when they got their pink slips. I thought for sure I'd be the first on the chopping block being the last one hired and the least necessary, but it turns out economics came into play first and foremost. A part-time employee is a lot cheaper to retain than a full-time, fully benefited employee, and a part-time employee who's had previous experience in different departments is more useful than one that has to be trained.

Closed Rose Garden Rose

Needless to say since March 1 my mind has been on other more immediately pressing issues of survival than on perfume and perfumery, though perfume and all it represents lingers in the fringes of my mind every waking moment. I returned from the Bay Area with bags of goodies once again, and I will be starting up the 365 Days of Olfaction series utilizing these bits and baubles of scent. I was inspired to create more edibles, and I did for days after returning from Berkeley, until the sugar and gelatin ran out. I've a lot of sorting to do and once I have I will unveil the new line of scentedibles. In the meantime, enjoy these lovely pictures of homemade perfumed Easter ~ Ostara marshmallows.

Rose Petal & Fresh Bergamot Peel Marshmallow

Rose Petal & Fresh Bergamot Peel Marshmallow Loaf

Spearmint Leaf Tea Marshmallow

Spearmint Leaf Tea Marshmallow Loaf Cut